On Disappointment

Disappointment can be a bitch. Disappointment is the ugly consequence of expectation. Not only are the two connected, they’re perfectly symmetrical. The greater the expectation, the higher the risk of disappointment.

The reason disappointment can be a bitch is because, despite all the evolutionary advances human beings have been blessed with, we haven’t learned how to accurately control our expectations. It’s a fact of life; it’s inevitable that you will be disappointed. Given that we humans are so shitty at keeping our expectations at realistic levels, it’s also certain that you’ll be disappointed for a large amount of your life. Let that sink in for a moment.

Disappointment knows no boundaries, as well. Because our shitty expectations have limitless applications. We expect to wake up early and seize the day. Every year, countless people expect to hit the gym every day for the rest of their lives starting on January 1st. Some of us expect someone else to love us as much as we love them. Now in our hyper-connected world, we even find ourselves disappointed in celebrities we’ve never freaking met. Some of us just wish this damn thing would work like it’s supposed to!

We are disappointed in ourselves, in the people around us, in people we’ve never met and in inanimate objects. It’s a vicious cycle that causes us to flock to articles promising the secrets of not giving a fuck. Entire publications speak to our most irrational disappointments in the grocery store checkout lane. Disappointment breaks up families over the most irrational bullshit.

We’re destined to be disappointed. That’s why people say life is a bitch, then you die—because disappointment from your expectations is inescapable. So what can you do? Well if it wasn’t obvious by now, you can’t do anything about it. I could tell you to expect that you’ll always be disappointed but if you’ve learned anything from this drivel, it’s that expectations will only cause disappointment.

I hope you’ve not be disappointed in my taking your time to talk about this subject. If you haven’t, don’t worry, something else will deliver you a big slice of it sooner or later.


Let Me Explain

I’ve been slacking on the updates. As if that wasn’t painfully obvious. The thing is, I’ve been working on some really cool stuff.

At work, I’ve been in charge of a complete redesign of one of our more important brands. The goal is to make this site less a brochure of offerings and more of a place of engagement.

The other thing I’ve been doing is laying the groundwork for the future of Short Story Thursdays. Hopefully soon, I’ll be able to share the exciting things that relate to this but until then, I’ve signed my own NDA.

These two major projects have caused me to be spend extensive amounts of time researching and reading. Drawing and jotting down visions of a final product. That means less writing time.

But I’m not in the dark, shackled to my desk. That’s why I’m employing a tool called IFTTT (If This Then That) to help me share the smaller bits of content I create throughout my day. I’ve started with photos and videos from Instagram, but soon will rig my Twitter to this as well.

That’s about it. I hope these more frequent, albeit shorter, updates will help keep this blog full of interesting things about me and my life.



The War on Drugs May Be Well Intentioned

Never before have I seen the failure of the war on drugs articulated as this response to someone asking how we get kids to stop getting addicted to heroin:

You want kids to stop walking this path? Stop telling them that weed and alcohol are as bad as all the other drugs. You make everything else seem like safe alternatives. Lay out exactly how people get caught up doing opiates and heroin, and establish safe havens for them to get help. Once you are addicted, there is no where to turn. To the law, you’re a criminal. To the doctor you’re a junkie. Let’s stop treating the drug addict as a criminal, and recognize that they are simply human. They didn’t understand the magnitude of the situation because they were fed all this “just say no” bullshit. Let’s be honest with our kids about drugs. Explain the differences between them. And provide a safety net for those who stumble. It’s better than adding a felony to someone’s record, and locking them up with no treatment, so they are doomed to repeat the same cycle.

You can read the whole discussion here: Reddit: New Jersey is seeing an alarming rise in herion use. Authorities scramble to curve “addiction epidemic” in suburbia


Marching into March

Hello, hello. Man time flies. Get a little lazy and before you know it it’s been forever since you’ve published a proper update.

If I could show you the backend of my site, you’d see numerous unpublished posts from the last few months.

Some about politics, one about my the nature of good or goodwill. I’ve even almost posted a few photos for the photo of the day. Most of them are unfinished thoughts and the photos were aborted because I figured they weren’t very interesting.

I’ve been writing too. I’m very near the end of my first short story. Hopefully I’ll be passing it off to my “editor” tomorrow so he can give me some notes before Mardi Gras.

Ah Mardi Gras! I haven’t been home for carnival since 2008. I guess I miss it, but what I really miss is king cake. Someone send me some? Please?

That’s all for today. Just wanted to end the radio silence. Oh, and a happy birthday to John Steinbeck. That’s the guy in the picture. He’d be 112 today.



I’m writing something personal today. Mostly because I need to get it off my chest. So, here goes nothing.

HOLY SHIT! A few minutes ago, I was standing in my bedroom packing. I looked up to see something I had become accustom to the last five years – my girlfriend, Reanna’s, bath towel hanging on my closet door in my bedroom. You see, this has been its proper place for some time now and after next Friday it won’t be anymore. All because Reanna and I will have finally had a place all to ourselves.

Since I moved here five years ago and even when I first lived here in 2006, Reanna and I have lived in two different places. Every weekend, it’s been a tug-a-war between her place and mine. The exhaustion of needing to be mentally in two places at one time can make anyone weary, but a few minutes ago it all lifted off my chest in a fit of celebration.

So much has been in flux this year, but I can’t help but tell myself to ride the wave. Soon I’ll be waking up every morning to the girl of my dreams. The girl I met eight years ago and have been steadily with the last five … and her devious little cat, too. I’m ready for this. It’s exciting; it’s exhilarating. I only wish I could share my enthusiasm with my brother. I know he’d be happy for me.

So that’s off my chest. I feel good about it and I hope you didn’t mind me getting it out there.


Score 1, Faith in Humanity

I’ve been down lately. Not down, down – just a bit unmotivated. Lots of things going on. Lots & lots. So I’m busy, but I’ve only continued to move ahead because it’s what I’m supposed to do. But I haven’t been trudging forward because I want to. Know what I mean?

It’s a funny thing, life. You can feel like I’ve been feeling for a long while and out of nowhere, something hits you with an injection of life. When it feels like everything in your chest suddenly warmed up. A sunrise hitting your face on a frosty morning. You’re probably dying to know what the hell it was by now. Sorry. As with many things, I found it on Reddit.

A user named “Whiskkas” posted the photo below with the following title:

While waiting tables tonight, a mother and daughter started crying mid-meal. I had no idea what happened until a single guy at the table next to them handed me this note with his bill. Faith in humanity, restored.

While waiting tables tonight, a mother and daughter started crying mid-meal. I had no idea what happened until a single guy at the table next to them handed me this note with his bill. Faith in humanity, restored.

I hope the family who found out about their diagnosis fight their disease and continue to have more happier moments for a really long time. To the person who extended the gesture … I wish more of us were like you. The world would be a much better place.